Photography © Chad Parenteau



My cat says
is a suckers game.

I bought him
a collar on Etsy

with the words
-I Voted-
embroidered on it

but I haven’t
made him
wear it.

As I hold it awkwardly
close to his face

about possibilities

he looks at me
like I’m wasting my breathe

not having believed
in anything
since being Catfished
by Taylor Swift.

Every night for nearly a year
the Pop Star mimicked
our neighbors cats ritual

until TSwift’s love dance
was revealed to be
a nefarious rouse concocted

to win a bet
with Ariana Grande.

It’s been zero fucks
and Sex Pistols
ever since

with the fact
that rich people

don’t give a shit
about any cats feelings.

My cat has neither name
nor game.

He has vowed
to never again
fall victim

to the niche
past times of celebrities

no matter how catchy
their songs are.


Host of The Garage Poets Open Mic, and master of the Dad Joke, Jeff Taylor lives in Massachusetts, with his wife and 3 kids.

Chad Parenteau is Associate Editor of Oddball Magazine.