Jagged Thoughts #4: This Boat is taking on Water- A Fairy Tale

I wake up on a boat. Put coffee in the cup. Power on the record player on the needle, the electric relaxation just happens… And I start to spin as the record spins The beat of my heart Is the tempo each thump is a high hat. Keeping on time   In rhyme, My eyes begin to heavy my brain begins to slow and SPLASH! Waves float backwards And I float upwards, I see gulls and hear sounds of boats water in eardrums. I begin to sink or do I begin to float? Mother! Mother we are taking on water  I am getting higher Oh Mother.

All I can see is blue, it reminds me of you, Mother.  Back to your cupboard, Used to love her, now I feel smothered And humpty dumpty told me…. (And I begin floating…) he Never trusted her. And damn he fell for her once Brain leaking out look like mustard. That reminds me of another time.

When Hansel and Gretel came up to my Landlord, And said they were hungry And all they could afford Were some chocolate coated floor boards Well that witch  got the oven ready  cause Rapunzel was coming over. You know Rapunzel,  She’s got angel hair, and I think a little Rollatini, and a nice fitting sweater.  The spider told me and now damn here comes the spider Eating up the curds in a way, You never know what he might, say.  Man never trust an arachnid.  Man get a napkin, Get a fly swatter, That brown recluse spider Is running away (And this boat is taking on water….)

And if the seven dwarfs can whistle while they work Then Snow White and Cinderella, can rematch  that twerk contest.  Re-relight the match that that kid jumped over…(And I feel smaller. And this boat is taking on water.)

The wicked witch got a brand new bag She told me I was the eighth dwarf, But it didn’t work cause I was like 6’ 2, and  missed too much work. I was off slaying dragons.  They dubbed me a nickname, The Mad Hatter called me Swagger.  Go head ask Sgt. Slaughter Got kicked out of  his class for writing on the boards and smelling magic markers, (And this boat is taking on water) Starved in The Hunger Games, in the mall at Foot Locker, The Farmer’s Daughter let me have her 5 senses for under a dollar Oh Molly Darling,  Why you even bother?   Oh these are stormy waters and Winter is coming.  Went to Rodeo just to do some slumming, bought an oven from a witches coven Watching American Horror Story,  while doing the Running Man in a trash can Singing Soprano I’m in Waste Management. Do the Trash can Boogie. Yeah Luigi, it’s that easy Trash can Trash can Boogie, Yeah Louie Louie it’s just that easy. Eat cheese, watch the ship sink. Yeah, Eat that Cheese watch the ship sink. Its that Easy.

This boat is taking on water I never felt so free As I sink down, black out into the deep. Erased into times little memories of me.

© James Conant
© James Conant

James Conant is a Cambridge artist who has recently added photography to his skills, which include clay sculpture, pen and ink, montages, and pencil art. He is always available for work and collaboration.

Jason Wright is the founder and Editor of Oddball Magazine. His “Jagged Thoughts” column appears weekly.

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