I hoped the headline was wrong. But there it was, the New York Times reported that the US Justice Dept. planned to release Darren Wilson of any wrongdoing regarding the death of Michael Brown.

I wasn’t surprised but I wanted to be wrong. I wanted to wake up and experience justice. I live with this confusing mix of emotions that makes puberty look like a dream: I know where I am via-a-vis US history, but I still hope for justice.

Hoping for justice is hard work. Working and hoping are part of the same equation. Ideally equal measures of work and hope should bring us to a state of justice for all, but we overlook a key factor. Hpe doesn’t always translate into justice for all. It can also be defined in terms of ‘justice for some.”

I am sad, consumed with sadness. My heart feels heavier that my body. I want to cry. At first I am puzzled, this feeling so familiar. I know this specific pain but am unable to name it. After hours of walking in circles I remember. It is heartbreak. I have been betrayed. The place I call home has broken my heart again.

How odd that a black man with the last name Brown was killed by a white Police Officer. Imagine how different things would have been if the same white Officer had shot and killed a white man with the last name Brown.

If justice is delivered according to US tradition, the white officer will be released of any wrong doing, because black lives don’t matter. And, in this place we call home, have fought for and contributed to, we are again reduced to nothing more than moving targets.


Janet Cormier is a painter, writes prose and poetry, and performs comedy. Her “Commentary on Canvas” painting is in her current exhibit at the Somerville Community Access Television Gallery for January and February.