I went to Catholic school. l was doing time, one school year, fourth grade. That seemed like an eternity. I was in Sister Mary Ann Margaret’s class. She was little, old and super mean. I went through fourth grade calling her Sister Mary and Margaret, which annoyed her. It was a sincere mistake, but I always thought she had this dual personality. Sister Mary was nice to her favorite students who were white with a few exceptions. Sister Margaret gave the rest of us hell.


In Catholic school we were told we each had a Guardian Angel. See prayer below. I mention this because in hindsight, I feel sorry for the Angel assigned to me.

Guardian Angel
Guardian Dear 
To whom God love permits me here 
Ever this day be at my side 
To light and guide 
To rule and guard 


I wasn’t a bad kid. I arrived on earth with a ton of interesting baggage. I was very inquisitive, creative, stubborn. I asked too many questions and aspired to be a mad scientist. I actually thought that mad scientist was a real job. I imagined that you got your own lab with cool equipment, a loyal assistant named Igor and lived in a castle.

The idea was based on my favorite TV show “Creature Feature,” a weekly sci-fi show that featured ole aka vintage movies. I believed what I saw. “Creature Feature” was for me what the 6:00 news was for adults. I spent many a day shorting out many electric outlets in the name of science.


Janet Cormier is a painter, writes prose and poetry, and performs comedy. Janet prefers different and original over pretty. She loves collecting stuff, but cleaning not so much. Janet also talks to strangers. A lot. Her column appears weekly on Oddball Magazine.