Bamboozled No More! JC’s Snow Thoughts

 

February 15 2015: We are into our 4th blizzard in 3 weeks. Late last night I shoveled out my doorway. This morning Mother Nature refilled the space with 19 inches of fresh snow. I know this because in a rational or irrational moment I plunged a yard stick into the snow.

So what have the naysayers of Global Warming have to say? Chances are they are sticking to their story. In my mind, I am haunted by an eerie vision which I make me want to shout, “See what happens when Hell can’t pay the heating bills!!”

This storm could create some awkward romantic situations. Think Valentine hook ups gone wrong, no escape. I predict we will see a lot of new wave of Bostonians arriving in October. No, not an immigration boom, more like a baby boom! Wonder what kind of names their parents will choose? My heart goes out to babies born into families with the last names White and Pyle. The princess phase for little girls will take an ugly turn with too many baby girls named Snow White. The sons of self proclaimed hipsters will be doomed the name Snow Pyle.*

According to the experts, we have lost the clutter/stuff wars. Now Mother Nature has decided to her clean house and pass the clutter on to us in the form of snow. Our streets already look like a really bad TV episode of some hoarders show. In this case, we are waist deep in stuff!! Where to put it all? Frustration has the potential of transforming shovels and snow blowers into the neighborhood weapons of mass destruction.

I predict this season of snow will lead to a proliferation of story tellers and poets who will remind us of kindness and snow madness.

*NOTE: Other names that may be chosen to commemorate the February storms and cause your kids to hate you include Snowflake, Snowstorm, Snowy, Snowdonia and Snowdon. On the other hand, it would be great to see the resurgence of names like Beverly and Scott.

 

Janet Cormier is a painter, writes prose and poetry, and performs comedy. Her “Commentary on Canvas” painting is in her current exhibit at the Somerville Community Access Television Gallery for January and February.

 

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