news just ain’t new or news.
Newspaper horoscopes is where its at.
Practical, wonderfully solid,
generic, invaluable info
on how to survive another day:
avoid saying anything, just listen;
do your very best;
listen to others around you;
get out of your way.
(variations: get of the way of others)
A Good/bad day to share your ideas,
look for a new path,
ignore suggestions from people with bad habits.

Imagine a world where
people actually acted on their horoscopes
or borrowed a horoscope identity..
news just ain’t new or news,
but the horoscope, now that where’s it at….


Janet Cormier is a painter, writes prose and poetry, and performs comedy. JC prefers different and original over pretty. She loves collecting stuff, but cleaning not so much. Janet also talks to strangers…a lot. Her column now appears weekly on Oddball Magazine.