The Underground Garden: Without Opinion Powder


 

I don’t believe stories about me, I don’t speak on behalf of others, I don’t assume or
claim and I stopped telling my tales lifetimes ago
I should’ve listened to my Mother lifetimes before that about that.

I don’t respond to inquiries posed for exposed thoughts when the questions stem
from the feelings of others not present
I think it’s called gossip.

Speaking on my actions’ behalf
Without speaking to me directly
After the speaker’s decisions affected me directly
Isn’t speaking.

Not even a dictionary can define me without my participation
Is all I’m saying.

I don’t act with regard to the feelings of others when the others are ones I’m defending myself against
Call it selfish
Call it as you don’t know it
I just told you about half truths based on full feelings missing accountability or,
I leave people worse than I found them.

I was born in a volcano.

“You wouldn’t like me when I’m angry” about the hurt full truths not sought hide
Half truths only speak on reaction
Consequence to unspoken insult
Always innocent betrayers who didn’t mean it
Can’t help it defense
Nor mention the details behind “it”
Only mention I deserved “it”
Or my reaction to “it”

When I was just minding my business.

Let’s focus on the way I did not handle things well.
Let’s ignore the way you were holding the door open to Hell
Let’s say my emotions got the best of me
While we don’t say your ego, demons, just plain ol’ self thought they’d get the best of me.

I don’t wear those types of glasses, hearing aid, heart pacemaker
Or swallow those pills.

There is only logic in matters of the heart.

I’ve been kind and blind
Loyal and strung
When my eyes opened takers were stung
Yet, no heads were hung
Only held higher
The truth is a liar
When the finger points in the direction of pants on fire

Meaning
I forgive but not in a way that means you get to live
Close to me.

Once I am shown the little I mean
I believe you
Once I remove myself from the ego in your mind
You believe me

I’m as naive as a full trusting ally absolutely
But as quickly as I believe in your love
Is as fast as I take my things and dash when I learn it’s an act

For our protection.

As giving as I am in love is as retrieving as I am in separation
I retain zero sentimental value and assume you do too
Shit, it’s over because of you. So then…
What’s there to hold on to?

I don’t defend stories about me
I don’t allow the speaking for me.
I don’t tell stories about me
I don’t speak for others.

I’m not full angel and neither half-demon
You can say the same. It’s your right.

Somethings just are the way they Be.
Finished or incomplete

It so be.

It’s between me and the distance between us.
Mostly, the only existing matter in my existence is Peace
Even when it means I don’t exist to others
That’s Peace.

So, when you say you keep it real, make sure you keep it real regarding you too
Rare be the mouth that can spew
Words that leave them in a dim light because it’s right
I roll in the dark
It’s how I own my part.

How do we maintain relationships where both charge the light where neither is wrong and neither is right because it’s not that type
Of union.

Selfless communions
That’s all I’m about doing.

Peace to the potions others be brewing. That’s all I’ll add to the mix.

 

Liza Zayas is a lover of writing and dancing and celebrates both as a singer and songwriter performing as Luna del Flor. You can hear her collaborative sounds and experience life through her storytelling. She invites you to dance. Her poetry seeks to initiate dialogue by intentionally expressing consequences of love, lust, ego and self-respect.