Jagged Thought #140: Choking


 

There is nothing more rewarding
than being able to hold down food.

For the last two weeks
I hadn’t.
I had become literally afraid of it.

I thought that I was slowly dying.
Two meals ended me in the ER.

After two endoscopies I was diagnosed EoE.
Told that it was a long recovery of
eliminations diets, allergists, and medications
and hopefully soon,
a return to food.

The levels of depression for those with EoE
is high. Food becomes your enemy. It becomes evil.

I called my doctor’s answering service yesterday.
I was on my way to Urgent Care. I told them that I couldn’t eat,
and hadn’t eaten in a long time.

The on call doctor prescribed me a medication
to keep ulcers down, that also works for Eosinophilic Esophagitis.

I also was given a medication for chemo patients that
helps me hold down my meals.

Tonight. I ate.
I ate for the first time.
In two weeks.

I ate the broccoli casserole that I was only able
to watch while everyone around me ate,
delicious, delicious,
honey kielbasa,
home made baked beans, mac and cheese,
chicken, pulled pork,
Auntie Renee’s meatballs, My wife’s famous macaroni salad,
Chocolate cream pie, sausages peppers and onions

As I ate there was less an urge to throw up my food.

After two weeks of protein shakes, apple sauce, and pedialyte, and two trips to the emergency room, I was eating.

I began to cry. i cried so much that my wife laughed at me.

At the hardware store that same night, a bird shit from the rafters and hit me
in the back of the neck while I was looking for a fly swatter.

I would have normally been pissed.
But I had been told in the past that being
shit on by a bird is good luck.

And that night I held down a meal for the first time in two weeks.

 

Jason Wright is the founder and Editor of Oddball Magazine. His column appears weekly.

 

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