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tales from an unemployed waiter 3

First off, I’m wearing a Queers shirt, and I never thought it to be offensive.
Second off, wearing a Dead Kennedy’s shirt in Boston would be a bad idea.
Further More wearing A Ted Kennedy’s shirt would be even worse.
What’s the deal with people using “like” all the time, that really bothers me.

so lets talk about my day today, first off I had three tables, one was a table of two who ordered two cups of soup, and left me a dollar. Whats with that, that really bothers me.

The other day this family came in and prayed for ten minutes while I held a ceasar and two baskets of bread in my hand. No consideration. None.

that same day, i worked a double and there was this family who insisted on calling me by my name, ordered me around, and then all I asked them to do was write a survey about me and they said sure. they lied folks, they lied. Not only did they leave me broken crayons and kids dough. but also a 11 percent tip.

Last night, that being the same day as this double, there was this group that didn’t speak english too well. And the guy said I’ll Have Z Stella artois. I said what? And he said Stella Artois with z bottle. That really bugged me too. They left me seven dollars on 63 and took the survey.

side note. theres this kid that wants me to bring in the picture to work, but it might just cause me even more bad luck then i already have.

Yeah, thats about it.

People who order soup and request free salad should be permitted from eating establisments….atleast mine

just another jagged thought from jason

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Tales from an unemployed waiter part two.

The work week was as expected, gloomy, like the weather today. This past Thursday, I worked a double. On break, I came back to blog, about the first half of my shift. Now with the memory of Thursday night slipping away from me, I will try to remember the three, yes three tables i had that miserable night.

First off there was the woman, who barely spoke. And when she spoke, she spoke lightly, nervously. She had two sons with her who seemed to be adopted, and that’s ok. She seemed like she had been really screwed up by past relationships. Generally, I felt pretty bad for her. Her kids didn’t like me. Even when I brought out icecream for them, they seemed perturbed. The bad thing about this is that they took the survey home.

Now you may ask yourself , who cares about surveys? And the answer is surveys are actually very important in the corporate chain that i work for. They let the higher ups know how the restaurant is running, and who should be commended and who should be put under the radar. I usually have a few good surveys a month, but lately all bad ones. Regardless, after the dinner, I still gave them a survey, hoping to the powers that be, that they wouldn’ take it, but they did.

The next table, was a table that i had waited on before. I knew they were difficult, but genuinely nice people. I thought I could be myself around them, and tried to incorporate humor into thier experience. First I argued with her about her primavera. She said she wanted it in a red sauce, and not a cream sauce, no problem. So I said to her, you want it in a pomodoro sauce. She said no, I want it in a red sauce. I said to her that pomodoro is a red sauce, but nevertheless, the customer is always right, and I was wrong. I went up to the kitchen and said, she wants it in a red sauce. They said you mean pomodoro? And I said yes, but she wants it in a red sauce. and Pat my friend the chef, said yeah, a pomodoro sauce. And I said that’s what I was trying to tell her. He said that she was a douche difficult customer, and I said, “well yeah”… Anyway, her kid started ordering me around, he was a ginger. Don’t get it twisted, I said ginger, meaning a red head soulless southpark character. Anyway he ordered me around for a bit. It really takes a toll on your self-esteem, when a kid, who’s barely out of diapers starts telling you what to do. I wanted to scream “I’m a grown man, your really damaging my sense of self worth.” But all i said was “sure, another milk…more bread, no problem.

I don’t know if I looked visibly annoyed, but the situation fell apart from there. The father came in with a Rolly Fingers moustache. A villainesque, mad scientist Gene Wilder looking moustache. Normally moustaches are suspect to me. In this case I thought, wow quite a nice moustache. He might have seen me examining his moustache and once again was not amused. Anyway, I don’t really recall what happened, besides the fact that they took the survey. Another pissed off customer. Another day of me shooting off my mouth. I swear I should stop talking completely.

The last table was a really chilled out table, who liked me but left the survey behind. FML

Anyway,

Respect the server who knows how to write, and stop ordering me around kid….just another jagged thought by jason.

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The Picture

O.k, so this is a little bit weird. Me and my girlfriend (or my girlfriend and I whatever you prefer) were cleaning out our living room closet the other night, and found something that we must have tried to hide along time ago, because it is incredibly creepy. It is a picture of an old woman, staring you dead in the face.We don’t know where the picture came from, but I swear this picture is haunting me wherever I go. I have these reoccurring dreams about an old woman’s house that I live in, that is haunted. Its so commonplace in my dreams that I don’t even get scared by it anymore. Anyway, we have this picture, and I was telling the guy at the corner store about it, because I talk to him about random stuff. He wants to see the picture, but I swear just staring at this picture, will haunt your dreams for the rest of your life.

We make jokes about it, but really this thing is creepy. We even are having a yard sale to get of rid of it. So if your interested in a creeptastic picture from beyond the grave, come to our yard sale.

Anyway, so last night, I was dreaming in a deep sleep, when something shook me out of bed, and I grabbed the pillow from underneath my girlfriends head, pretty aggressively, and it was pretty hilarious. She woke up instantly having no longer support for her prettyhead, and asked me why the hell I did that, we laughed, and I don’t know why, but I think it has something to do with this picture.

I really don’t know, I guess it was a you had to be there moment, and seriously not as funny to you, as it was to us. So closing off, when you have a picture that you don’t know where it came from, and you pull the pillow out from under your girlfriends head, it is time to get rid of the picture

so in closing

When a picture makes you have an impromptu yard sale, just to get rid of the damn thing, well then its time to move, or call an exorcist, or give it to your brother as a wedding gift.

just another jagged thought by jason

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The New Fight

Well, my story of my life has changed from this day on. I am not going to suffer through my life, complaining why me, because I have mental illness. People need to learn to deal with it. And people with mental illness need to realize that its not their fault. Sounds cheesy like a Good Will Hunting reference, but this is true. I am sick and tired of having to always say to my mind, that today will be ok. You know what? F that, my mind is my mind is my mind. Those who suffer from mental illness, like Bi-polar, SchitzoEffective, OCD, or thought broadcasting syndrome. Yes that is a real thing. No one can no longer sit tied down by their illness. We should be proud of who we are. Each thought, each voice, all this confusion, is not our fault. We, the mentally ill, need to realize that this life is our only life, and their is no longer reason to be ashamed. Speak up. Me, I’m PschitzoEffective, I can say it, may not spell it right, but that’s what I am. So you know what, people who don’t have any problems mentally, may not understand that.
And I ‘ll tell you another thing, I am a waiter, you know how difficult it is to maintain normalcy, in a world that doesn’t understand? That’s why us people with mental illness, we need to learn to stand tall. Man the storm, ya know what I mean?

So from this day forward I will no longer be ashamed to be Skitzo Effective, I will no longer be ashamed and guard my thoughts. I am as sane as anyone else. And you know what people with mental illness helped build this society we live in, and what do we do now? Stigma, Self-loathing, patronization, we treat our mentally ill like second hand citizens. Mental Illness effects us all, tell me you don’t know someone who suffers. And if you don’t your a lier. It is time for a mental health alliance. Mental Health effects all, whatever color, sexual orientation, brown eyes, blue hair, doesn’t matter, us the people with mental illness, we need to form a foundation, stop the stigma, feel better for once, we need to band together. Be proud of what god gave us.

Stop Stigma Now!

just another jagged thought by jason

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Damian Marley’s Welcome to Jamrock

First off this album is amazing. Great lyrics, profound, and good beats.   It has everything that a good album needs, except of course the Oddball Seal of Approval.  Damian “Jr. Gong” Marley, takes everything that makes music good, and makes it better. Driving beats, thoughtful lyrics, and guest stars like Nas and Black Thought from the Roots, make this a must have for any Reggae and Hip-Hop fan.   Seriously good stuff.

Check out There For You and In 2 Deep, but serously this is a chill cd.  If you can find it on vinyl get it. And don’t download it, buy it.   I don’t get stealing music, movies makes sense, but music, is perishable, when you download music from independent record labels, you may be digging the music, but your also digging a hole in the ground for the label. Anyway, back to my point, this shit is good.

This is one of the best reggae/hip-hop cd’s i have heard in a long time, I got it in a mix with Madvillain, the flaming lips, and STP, a weird mix, but still a good one.  The title song off the Album, Welcome to Jamrock, bumps, the lyrics are chill in your ear, and the samples keep the shit going, its great.   See me, I don’t blaze up but if you did, you would probably would enjoy this.  But if your like me, and just like music, and don’t smoke the senseamilia, it still sounds good.

Definitely respect for this album, Jamaican flavor, nice…keeps your head bopping

Welcome to JamRock gets the ODDBALL SEAL OF APPROVAL…

just another jagged thought by Jason.

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tales from the unemployed waiter

So I wait right? its not an amazing life, but its what an English Major from Umass who got his BA does. Its cool, but here are some stories from my work. First off, made 17 dollars at lunch today. I work at a joint where i am required to encourage survey taking. So regardless of how I am doing, I have to encourage the patron to write a survey about me. Now I have enough problems dealing with people as it is. I try my best, but it seems like it’s not enough, but that’s o.k. Anyway a couple of suits came into work today, and they were not interested in me, or the specials, or even a friendly hello. I guess when you are working at a place like mine, people assume you are some kind of failure in life, and that’s why you work lunch shifts. At night, maybe people understand, but during the day, they have an idea about you. This idea is that you are a failure. But that’s o.k

Maybe they think your a stoner, or a loner, or a broke asshole. What they don’t know is I am a writer, and I can intellectually blog about each experience I have with them. So, that was today. I had three tables, one was a really nice guy with a retarded son, and I was genuinely nice to them. The suits, fake nice. The other table was a table that used a coupon, that took five dollars off the bill, and then with a whopping 24 dollar check, they decided to tip me 10 percent, FML. Anyway, I am writing now this in my apartment listening to MadVillain. Still unemployed, still waiting, and of course still blogging.

people at restaurants shouldn’t breast feed in public, or breastfeed all you want, just tip me atleast 15 percent…just another jagged thought by jason